steps down a path that you know you shouldn't stray to. actions taken resulting in what could only be described as tragically fucked up habits. fine. fine. I know what I'm doing. right?
put oceans between yourself and what grounds you; what keeps you sane. replace them with vices. it feels wrong. add more and more until you can't feel. then you've done it right.
I am hurting you, I know. it's selfish. but still, I block your avenues to me. you reach, I pull away. you call to me, I turn a deaf ear. you question, and I give silence. but for whose benefit?
I am missed, you say. well, I miss myself too.
in truth, it fucked me up; but I am fucking myself over daily. I wouldn't dare let you see me now, you wouldn't recognize me. I don't recognize me.
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